Thursday, May 22, 2014

Daylight Savings Lame

In case any of you were wondering I will not be appearing in an episode of Catfish, that TV show about people that start online relationships with people who may not be who they seem. Turns out there was a problem with one of the routers my chat client was using and all my communications were actually being bounced back to me. Therefore it turns out I was Catfishing myself. Which is unfortunate because I felt like I had really developed a strong connection with me.

Anyways, you know what else is lame? Daylight savings. Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for the setting the clocks back in the fall, but do we have to set them forward an hour during the spring?

Pat, I say we start getting rid of the jumping forward part but keep the setting the clocks back in the fall part. What do you say?

Pat:  Is catfishing related to noodling? I think we posted about that awhile back--that thing where people try to catch fish my shoving their arms down the fishes gullets? Both of those terms sound kinda’ dirty when you are also thinking about online relationships. There’s too many kinks in the world, Christian. I just can’t keep up with them all.

Something tells me that continuing only half of the daylight savings/losings tradition is a bad idea, whichever way you go. Over the course of 24 years, it seems like you’ll find yourself in either yesterday or tomorrow. That can’t be good.

Christian: Why? If it’s yesterday that means we’ve gained a whole additional day! We could watch a whole season of Airwolf in a day! Sweet!

What’s not to like here?

I’m suggesting we just get rid of the spring forward part, which would put us into tomorrow after 24 years. Yes that would be bad. It seems like I always have stuff to do tomorrow.   

Pat: Amen to that, brother! WAY too much stuff. Better to live in the moment, I say. Tomorrow will take care of itself...just like my taxes.

How many seasons of Airwolf were there? Tragedy, what happened to Jan Michael Vincent. Pure tragedy.  Still chokes me up just thinking about it.

Oh wait...that was Jon-Erik Hexum.

Christian: Jan Michael Vincent is still alive as far as I know. Did you know his character’s name on the show was Stringfellow Hawke? Hawke I get, but Stringfellow?

If only we had gotten rid of the spring forward part of daylight savings time before they created the show. That would have given the writers more time to come up with a better first name for their Airwolf piloting hero.

See? This is the kind of tragic results that I’m sure we suffer from every year because of daylight savings. How many more ill-named TV action heros are we going to suffer from before we put an end to this horror?

Does this not convince you that we should get rid of it, Pat? (I’m still talking about just getting rid of the spring forward part.)

Pat: No. Not in the least. For one thing, I was never really interested in those 80s helicopter-centric TV shows. Well, I can only think of four of them (and one of them--“China Beach”--was really a Vietnam-centric show with a lot of helicopters in it)...but I wasn’t too into them beyond a couple of episodes.

Now...consider the ability to revert daylight savings time in order to get more episodes of “Square Pegs”, “Fantasy Island”, or any show starring Ann Jillian and then we’re talking!

Christian: You don’t have to watch Airwolf. Or Blue Thunder. Or… wait was there another helicopter themed show in the 80’s? I don’t put China Beach in the same helicopter category as Airwolf and Blue Thunder. You’re not including Riptide are you? Yes it had a helicopter, but I wouldn’t say it was helicopter-centric.

Pat: Yeah it was! That helicopter was almost the best part of that show! Sure, it didn’t have the rugged swagger of Blue Thunder, or the streamlined stealth of Airwolf, but the Screaming Mimi stole the show almost every episode with her shaky-but-reliable persona.

Don’t kill my heroes, Christian. We’ve talked about this before. A lot.

Christian: There is no fucking way “Riptide” was a helicopter show.

If someone was to ask “What is the premise of “Riptide”?” You would say it’s about two former Army buddies that start a private detective agency on a boat or something. But you can’t describe the premise of Blue Thunder or Airwolf without saying the word helicopter. If you did you would be a dirty liar.

I’m starting to think that you’re not the right person I should be pitching my “only fall back” daylight savings plan to.

Pat:  Probably not. Sorry you’re just figuring that out now. You know me. I like my routines, and daylight savings is just one of those annual routines that I don’t want to give up. It’s also the reason I refuse to travel to Arizona.

And we really don’t need to get into it here, but “Riptide” is, too, totally a helicopter show.

Christian:  You may have won this Riptide-is-a-helicopter-show battle, but the war is not over my friend. TO BE CONTINUED!


  1. I hate the "fall back" part. Who wants to drive home from work after the sun goes down? It's horrible torture, just like watching Airwolf. How can the resolution of every show lead to the use of a helicopter? Why didn't the bad guys invest in, I don't know, submarines or mole-men?

    1. AIRWOLFFFFFFFFFF! Thank! I had so blocked that memory!

  2. The 80's & 90's are to crime-fighting vehicles (cars, planes, helicopters & submarines) as the early 21st century is to spin-off series with the same name but set in another city. The television industry ran out of the ability to generate original ideas a long time ago didn't they? Still, imagine how much more mileage they could have gotten (no pun intended) out of the show if they had a "Knight Rider: New York".

    Ooh! I know! You guys should move to the tropics. No daylight savings time here whatsoever.

  3. I don't think the falling back without springing forward would work.

    I've charted it out, and it would definitely lead to problems. The physics are complicated, but I'll summarize: Eventually, we'd start finding more and more people walking in on themselves an hour earlier. You walk into your kitchen and there is another you, eating whatever you were eating an hour ago.

    That might not be a problem if it only happened once - after all, the earlier you will probably disappear in an hour when THEY too go through the fallback, but if we just kept falling back year after year, eventually, there would be dozens of you, and that would call all sorts of problems.

    This blog also made me think about a show called "Hardcastle and McCormick," which was a car drama that went off the air the year after I was born. My dad had videotaped all of the episodes, though, so i have seen them.

    It was sort of Airwolf in a car, with a less keyboardy theme song.

    I am sort of disappointed that you skipped "Hardcastle and McCormick" here.

    1. Your wish was already our command:

  4. We should eliminate the daylight savings thing all together, though I would indeed mis the falling back thing. I also advocate lengthening the second just enough to get rid of that leap year thing.

  5. Why was that thing called Blue Thunder when clearly it didn't make a sound?

  6. Pat is 100% correct-Fantasy Island, China Beach, Square Pegs and anything Ann Jillian related are 1 million times better than your stupid helicopter shows. Talk about unrealistic premises. Ann Jillian as a cocktail waitress or the unlikely kinship between Tatoo and Mr Roake is way more believable.

  7. Uh yeah, you know who DIDN'T need a helicopter to get around? The Greatest American Hero. That guy could FLY.

    That's right. I went there. Believe it or not, it's just me.

  8. More shows should have helicopters these days. They add to everything. Dancing With the Stars, Downton Abbey, Game of Thrones, all these things suffer due to lack of helicopters. Daylight savings probably plays a role, too.

  9. Yesterday was a good day so I'm all for it.

  10. I don't believe in time change or helicopter shows.


    It's half the fun and one of the few connections with humans (if you ARE human) that I have.

    Why do you hate me?

    Also, I think Blue Grumpster should quit showing off his/her bolding skills. It just makes me feel bad.

    I know self centered-ness can be annoying but I don't think Christian can help it.

    1. OMG, I just had to prove I wasn't a robot after I clearly insinuated you two are robots.

      I think the worst has happened. I'm calling for Plan X to go into action, hang on….

    2. Also? I never say/type OMG. I may have been infiltrated.

    3. I hate to beat a dead horse/robot but your Facebook page isn't working either and I'm getting paranoid. Also hungry.

    4. And I'm pretty sure robots are good at numbers so the trick of proving I'm *not* one by making presumed robots look at numbers is kind of silly.

    5. Quick! What's 2 + 3? Keep in mind a robot will know the answer but only a human would purposely answer it incorrectly.

    6. *or* would they try to out-robot the robot, knowing that robots beleive they are superioir, and give the correct answer (apple) in their mind but with their fingers crossed but type in 5 to appease the wonderful robot overlords?

      (if you are confused, you are a robot)

  11. Mostly, I just feel relief that that the fate of our national time setting is being taken on by men who can so singularly focus on Riptide. Whew! Carry on, gentlemen.